Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
