it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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