You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
