All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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