ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
