i don't like sucking hair
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
