It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
