Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
