I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I've blown a few things in my day
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
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