i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
