i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
