guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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