Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
