You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
