Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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