cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
