Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
