I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Randomize
