Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
