This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
