Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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