Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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