Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
