this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
