Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
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