I met the friendliest cop last night
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
