The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
