just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
