I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
