My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
two words...techno handjob
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
