He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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