nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
