lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
