everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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