Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
