HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
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