I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
