Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I love having hate sex.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
