Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
