I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
they need to just BURY HIM!
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
