Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Randomize
