Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
