so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
