i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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