No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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