I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
