my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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