end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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