I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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