Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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